I have not updated for the longest time in the world!!! What's Up World???  Anyhow...let's see... 10 New Things

1. I am a Sophomore now at Lincoln Christian College and I LOVE it and my bestest friends here!

2.  I am in a wedding on October 7th.  Kyle Howard is marrying Kendall Moon and it is going to be great fun!

3. I am never online for fun anymore because i have so much stinking homework. 

4. I have the same AMAZING roommate!  <I LOVE HER>

5. I have a freaking AmAzInG boyfriend who absolutely AdOrEs me. <L/O/V/E/ /H/I/M>

6. I am still a Worship Ministry major and I love that I get to sing for the rest of my life.

7. I go home a lot.

8. I worked at the Oncology Hematology Associates of Central Illinois this summer and LOVED it!

9. I just got back from a mini-vacation with my grandparents to New Salem

10. My family and I went to Rhinelander, WI for vacation this summer and it was the best vacation we have ever taken as a family.

Yeah so that is about it, NOT, but I have to finish this missions paper!

<3 Kayla

BASIC CHRISTIAN BELIEFS ROCKS MY SOCKS

so let's face it, i am not a writer at all.  i would love to let you guys read what i am writing right now just so that i could watch you laugh so hard that you fall off your chair and hit the ground while rolling around laughing until you pee your pants.  that's right i am writing another paper for a Basic Christian Beliefs class.  It is now 3:43 am and this paper is due at 8 am this morning.  i am really tired, and i am suprisingly really hungry.  i guess that when you sleep you probably don't think of your stomach very much, so it really doesn't affect you.  well my tummy is growling so much...hehe oh well.  this paper is to be 6 pages long and on the Trinity.  It is 3:44 and i have a page and a half done, and that is all i really want to say on the paper.  so i guess i am SOL...kinda stinky.lol  i will figure something out.  i guess i just had to get something off my chest, gonna go back to writing...hehe...wish me luck!!!

<3 ya like crazy

KaylaChele

So what to do.  i have to do this crappy PBS worksheet and i really don't want to.  yup, that's right, i don't want to.  the more that i get into this class (Principles of Bible Study) the more that i get confused.  what am i supposed to do with literary context and other stuff like that?  do you know that the average assignment from mr. sanders takes 2-3 hours?  yeah, that is 2-3 hours out of my day that i should be in the practice room with or doing other homework.  ok enough with the complaining, it isn't that it is hard, it is just that i lack the self-confidence to do them. if that makes any sense at all. ohh well. i have to go and do some of this crazy pbs stuff.  YAY!!!

<3 ya, KayChele

"Your Grace Is Enough, Your Grace Is Enough, Your Grace Is Enough For Me!!!!" -Chris Tomlin

about a month ago i applied for a job at comfort inn here in lincoln because i needed a job. long story short they told me that i could work graveyard shift on sunday nights from 11 pm to 7 am on monday morning.  i took it because they said it would get better.  then i called back to set up training times and they said that they needed me also to work on saturday nights graveyard shift.  this means that they would have me working everyweekend on saturday from 11pm to sunday 7 am then to go back to work on sunday night from 11 pm to 7 am on monday morning. i could either do this or not work for them.  i said that i couldn't do it becuase i have never even worked that shift before and i was willing to do it for one night, but i didn't think that i could do it for two nights in a row for weekends on end.  so i called my mom and i was really upset and she just said, "kayla, God just took this job and put it in your lap and you are not going to take it, just like that? Call them back!"  so i called them back and i explained my position and told them that i would be willing to do that, but i didn't know how i would do because i have never done this before.  they called me back later that night and said that i didn't have a job with them anymore because they wanted a definite "i can do this" not a "i'll try" kinda worker.  naturally i was really upset.  i tried to shake it off as if it never happened and that i could do better than that stinky comfort inn anyway.  well all that craig had to do was give me a hug and  all the emotions ran out of me.  i was bitter and angry because i didn't know how someone could give you a job and then take it away before you even started your training and you didn'teven do anything to get it taken away.  I GUESS IT CAN HAPPEN!!

I went to Focus here that night and i was tellin Beth and Melinda about it and they were both kinda like "whoa".  i was like yeah.  so at the end of the service we sang "Your Grace is Enough".  somehow God took His wonderful hands and wrapped them around me and said that it was all going to be okay, but what i need to realize is that His grace is enough.  His grace is enough.  it really is.  i was too busy trying to rely on my self to bring in money for myself and for me to provide for me and that only i can satisfy myself with this job.  but in all reality, i really want to be wrapped in the arms of God.  i want Him to help me...i just can't do it by myself anymore.   it just frustrates me that i let myself get this far.  i guess i am getting really selfish.  this is not something that has been huge in my life, i mean yeah we are all selfish beings, but i usually did think of the other person.  in this case, i didn't.  is that truely how selfish i have become?  God's grace is enough for me.  I dont need anything else.  i need to get back into gear with God.  not that i haven't been, i don't want you to get the wrong impression of me, i just need to pour more of my life into Jesus.  He gave His precious sinless life for me and i am being selfish and not taking it rightly.  when did this all happen?  wow.  I feel better now.  GOD LOVES ME!!!  How Beautiful.

<3 KaylaChele

yeah so i am pretty much really frustrated with a lot of things right now.  i have a paper due tomorrow morning at 8:00 in basic Christian beliefs on the Bible revealed, written, spoken, and lived.  i guess i really don't feel like i have done my job as a Christian because i can't think of what to write.  is this really my task for life to be a worship leader?  really?  i don't even know much about the bible and i thought i did.  i guess this may be a humbling experience, but i didn't think i was being arrogant about the Bible.  i just don't know.  i also have to spend 10 hours now in the practice room.  that means that if i divide that time into 7 days then i would have to put an hour and 26 minutes in the practice room a day and that is assuming that i can get into the chapel on sat. and sun.  it just is sooo hard.  i know you say ohhh an hour and a half a day, but you try to sit in a small room with a piano, which by the way i don't know how to play, and try to memorize songs to perfection.  it is merely impossible.  i sit in there alot of the time and even doubt my whole being and if i am really called by God to do this wonderful task of being a worship leader.  why in the world do i have to go to school to become a worship leader?  think about it...in your church does your worship leader have a worship ministry degree or even a music degree for that matter?  i tell you what.  i know that this is where God wants me, but man satan is gettin his evil grip on me.  i just feel like i have no point to this at all.  what in the world is my problem?  i just hate to be this way.  just pray for me.  please....

absolutely hopeless,

KaylaChele